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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
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🇨🇦

Toots are ephemeral, subject to deletion on a whim.

Born at 323 ppm. Living at the crossroads of the Butlerian Jihad and Idiocracy.

I've been terminally online for ~40 years, long before the big endless scroll. I've seen things some people wouldn't believe. 1200 baud modems on fire from Usenet flame wars. I watched c-news servers stutter at the mere mention of Kibo. All those moments will be lost in AI slop, like tears in rain. Time to deshittify.

We are Infinity of Borg.
Bandwidth is Futile.
You will be Queued.
Location
Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada
Pronouns
he/him (EN)
Photography https://eh.fauxtographer.ca/@another
Jetsons Screenshots Bot @Jetsons@mastodon.social
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
2w
Dentist waiting room has fairly loud country station on, which is more painful than anything that happens in the dentist’s chair.

Ten minutes of commercials make it even more painful.

Oof, more twang strumming now.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
2w
Avoid Kessler Syndrome with this one weird hack.

Simply rub bacon fat on all starlink satellites so they can slide easily past one another.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
2w
Require all social networking platforms to exclusively use uucp bang paths for routing.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
2mo
I remain amused that our microwave has power settings 1-7. Nothing higher. It's like they watched Spinal Tap but misremembered 11 as 7. "But this one goes to seven!"
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1mo
If you can still see the surface of the toast, there isn't enough peanut butter and jam on it.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
17h
@fname I don't really produce any video but the thought of standing up an instance is tickling a corner of my brain.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
17h
@Chigaze That's right, it goes in the square hole.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
17h
@fname Is it automated to grab from yt or wherever, or do you need to manually do things?
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1d
@hsza @Serena Eh, kill the scroll and have pages.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1d
Used NFS in anger today. Don't make me come down there again, silly NAS.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
2d
@onelesstweeter @caseyliss The new tongue centric keyboard comes preinstalled as default on every iphone duo.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
3d
@ZenHeathen Mute Conversation is there on the mastodon web interface I just checked on a .social account. (three dot menu on a post)
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
3d
Yay, and Evernote uses privacy something mail domain? lol.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
3d
@dnorman At the first whiff of ai I close the tab. Unfortunately becoming more difficult to spot quickly.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
4d
@ZenHeathen @Guillotine_Jones That's the migratory WWAAAAAHOOOOOOWAAAOOOOOOOOWAOOOO advance scout bird, which stops on selected roof tops to make it's travelling noise to tell it's flock which way to go.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
4d
@dnorman The Plaza is still a thing? Neat.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
5d
The Goatse Ring
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
6d
@ZenHeathen pi-hole Or AdGuard home

raspberry.tips/en/raspberrypi-tutorials/pi-hole-vs-adguard-home-comparison
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
6d
@ZenHeathen Automated Arrrr. Will hold quite a few 4k things. If it fails, not a big deal as it’s just ephemeral content.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
6d
@anon_opin Maybe you're just boring as fuck.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
6d
Scheduling my vaccinations on the Alberta health site and the email confirmation shows up in my inbox as CST timezone. holdthepain
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1w
@AnnieBuddy In the end I landed at a job where the CEO would pop by for a random chat and ask me how things were going down in the coal mine and if there was anything he should be aware of. He knew that I didn't sugar coat things, and I knew that he had a lot of high level things on the go that I wasn't aware of but I also really appreciated his drive by checks of the canary. That was a fairly good place to end my working days at.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1w
Political Weasel Activity


meme stolen from some other social platform
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1w
@AnnieBuddy I may have burned some political capital a few times in my working years by going “I told ya so, but you didn’t listen” after some events that caused a mad scramble. Worth it.
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Machine Enema of the Empire @phasorburn@phasorburn.com
1w
New phone. Managed to transfer all data over easily but messed up eSIM. Erased old phone before I realized that.

Quick trip to the mall to give the two bored employees of the phone provider some entertainment, and I’m all functioning again.

Under 30 minutes to drive across town, get it fixed, drive home. Love small cities.
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